From their splendidly isolated locations in Skopje, Macedonia and Oro Valley, Arizona, USA, Cvetin and Jason continue to discuss issues related to the coronavirus and now the massive economic impact it will have on the world as economies slow down and as entire industries border on shutting down. They discuss events in Macedonia including the government’s state of emergency, the new nightly curfew, the weather (yes) and the fact that Macedonia joined NATO. Oh, you didn’t notice? All of that and more on this week’s episode!
Music by:
- Mizar (Pocesna strelba - Last salute)
- R.E.M. (It's The End Of The World As We Know It - And I Feel Fine)
With gratitude to Mark Steyn for giving us the idea for the podcast name
The cold open: Baba Rada, a Macedonian grandma who runs a popular TV show and is famous for promoting all-natural herbal teas and medicine, announced she has developed a cure for the coronavirus flu. In an ad campaign funded by the Zoran Zaev led Government, Baba Rada said that marijuana, grown on Zoran Zaev-owned marijuana plantations, mixed with Mama’s ajvar, produced by a Zoran Zaev owned ajvar factory, is somewhat efficient in relieving anxiety from the coming societal collapse. Ok, maybe just smoke the marijuana and forget about the ajvar, Rada told the public in a Zoran Zaev Government funded ad. And Tikves, the wine and spirits company in Macedonia's little Tuscany style region of Kavadarci said it tried switching to producing hand sanitizers instead of their usual grape rakija. A short inspection from the CDC and the plan was abandoned after it was determined that the Tikves rakija is actually an overkill. The stuff was found to be so potent it destroys the virus better than medicinal alcohol rubs, but the unwarranted side effect of the patients demanding pickled cabbage, cheese and cold cuts platters and live music after administering the cure was found to be an inconvenience. And in news of the week which nobody alive was paying attention to, some nameless Balkan country marked by a red and yellow emoji sign in most tweets officially joined NATO. The ratification document was transported to Washington D.C. from Spain by the submarine which Macedonian drug runners were using to transport three tons of Colombia's finest to the United Kingdom. Macedonia's biggest nautical endeavor since Alexander had his admiral Nearchos sailed down the Indus river, was cut short by the Spanish policia and the submarine was conveniently moored in a police dock in Spain making it the ideal vessel to bring the ratification document from Madrid to D.C. US Acting Assistant Interim Deputy Ex Officio Secretary of State Philip Reeker wiped the envelope with wet wipes to be on the safe side before declaring that the Emoji Country has finally joined NATO after decades of Greek objections. He went on to tell the Emoji Country that this means no more funny business - no using Russian gas, no purchasing Chinese breathing masks, no more selling Colombian cocaine to the UK and no more meddling in US elections. That's our job, Reeker added.
Macedonian Content Farmers Podcast Episode 64 – Splendid isolation: Week 2